Tuesday, May 13, 2008


Why is it so hard to keep up a blog? I certainly don't seem to have any trouble reading other blogs! So why is it so hard to update mine? I have a love/hate relationship with writing that seems to get in my way. I love the idea of writing and I love reading other people's beautiful or funny writing, but I have a mental block when it comes to my own writing. It's not that I can't do it, I just don't seem to enjoy it. But oh I wish I did!

I have a terrible memory. I have a hard time remembering what my boys' baby and toddler years were like (and they're only eight, ten, and 12), so forget about me remembering my own childhood! When I read blogs where mothers write letters to their children every month, or even once a year on their birthdays, I have such deep regrets that I didn't do the same. Every now and then I will see or hear or smell something that brings back a memory of those precious, fleeting years, but I don't remember the ordinary day-to-dayness of it all. What we did each day, what I fed them, our schedule, the little moments. And this is the stuff I want to remember! I did jot down the occasional funny saying, and thank god I take photos! At least we have a visual reminder. But not the stories, and those are so important.

Can I do better? I don't know. It's never too late to start. Years from now, I'll be glad I started at this point, because some day these memories will be gone too. My boys have amazing memories. They remember details: who was there, who did what, what they ate, who said what. But they will eventually forget too.

My middle boy keeps a journal. Every night he faithfully writes his entry. And it's amazing! He will be so happy to have it some day. I plan to add photos and publish it on Blurb for him as a surprise. Over the years I have kept a journal on and off (mostly off). I have one from elementary school, one from my college year in Europe, and one from the year I graduated college. I love to look back and see what I was doing 20 or 25 years ago today. And someday my son can do the same. Will he become a writer? I don't know. He says he doesn't love journaling, he justs wants to remember. How can he be so wise at such a young age?

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